Being Accepted

At some point in time in our lives we have worried how people viewed us. From the way we look, the clothes we were, and the we act. Some people let this worry run their lives. They have to have the best clothes, body, and act a certain way. The biggest reason people worry about all this is they want to excepted by their peers. Many people think when you talk about being accepted it means being popular or being in the “popular” group but that is untrue. I have know people that have just wanted to fit in with different group besides the “popular” group. When you hear all this you probably think of junior high or high school students but wanting to accepted does not end once you are out of school. Wanting to be excepted that happens your whole live, in once shape or another. There are many times a person wants to feel accepted.  From wanting to fit into a group at school to being new at a work place and wanting to feel welcomed by your coworkers. In order to be accepted many times we change to fit the profile of the people we are waning to fit in with. Some of those changes can be minor but some of the time those changes are major. I have known people that have colored their hair, starved themselves, and did something they never really wanted to do just to be accepted. Once these people get to where they think they want to be it tends to not be anything that they expected it to be. The people they wanted to be there friends are their so called “friends” but if they were true friends you would not have had to change just to be part of their group. By that time they have forgotten who they really are, which can lead to being unhappy. I asked a friend why she thought people changed to fit in and this is what she said, “People in general mostly change to fit in because they just want more and are insecure. They already have friends but hey they want to be the most popular kid on the street, so they change to get more friends or even "better", "cooler" ones to them. Everyone wants to fit in and feel wanted but they don't know that changing themselves to make them more like someone or something else won't help that problem and turns them into jerks a lot of the time.” After people change they tend to wish they could just be themselves again and not have to put on an act. If you just be yourself you will build more self confidence and be truly happy. If you are yourself you will find friends that care about you for who you are and not ask you to change for any reason. 

How It All Started

It was a Sunday morning in early August, and I was at church. My church had recently hired a new worship pastor and it was his first Sunday at the church. Our pastor had the new worship pastor and his family stand up at the front of the church to introduce them to the congregation. As my pastor went through introducing everyone in the family he came to the worship pastor’s son, Chandler. Not going to lie my first thought was, “he is kinda cute.” After service my friend was talking to him so I thought I would be nice and go introduce myself, because I know what it is like being new in town. I am kinda of a shy person until you get to know me so I did not really say a whole lot. Later that night when talking with one of my best friend, I was a typical girl and told her about the new worship pastors son. She went on to tell me that I need to put myself out there and just have fun because I am always really cautious. A week later after our college Bible study he invited my friend from church, another guy, and me over to his house for a little bit. After we were at his house we all decided to go to the movies. My friend from church was not able to go, so I was not going to go. I was not going to go because the “other guy” that was there was my ex boyfriend. My ex boyfriend and I had dated for over a year and had broken up six months prior. So it would have just been me, the guy I kinda liked, and my ex boyfriend, but for some crazy reason I said yes. I think it was because I  could not get what my friend said out of my head, “Put yourself out there Amber.” It was probably one of the most awkward things ever. Poor Chandler did not know that he was my ex until after the movie when he was in the car with my ex and he told him. Just because it was an awkward night it did not keep me from putting myself out there. The next night I invited Chandler over to my house to watch a movie. It was a great night just hanging out and talking. That night he invited me to go to Tulsa with him to help his family move the last of their stuff. So the next morning I went with him to Tulsa. I had never done something like that before. I had only known this guy for like a week and a half and I was going to go with him to Tulsa, just me and him. The car ride their was great, we talked the whole way there about everything under the sun. It was probably one the deepest and meaningful conversations that I have ever had. After we got to Tulsa we had an amazing day together. I was able to learn a lot about him and the things he liked to do. In addition I got to meet his family that day including his grandparents, which I loved from the very beginning. After our trip we both left to go out of town, I went camping and he went to Nebraska The whole time we were texting and talking to each other whenever we could. We both had told each other that we interested in each other, but that was as far as we had really talked about it. When I got home from camping I checked my Facebook and I noticed I had a relationship request. When I clicked it, it said Chandler request to be in a relationship with you. It brought a smile to my face and made me laugh. After getting that I texted him, “so what’s our relationship status.” And that is where our story begins.